Devotion, light, pain, and the Christ Archetype

Why embracing your light often feels like an inner crucifixion (and how to rise)

There is a part of my story I rarely speak about. Yet it has been an immense impact on who I am today, and why I said yes to a free summit I am inviting you to: the Awaken the Christ Within Summit.

I was born and raised in a very devout Catholic family in Cameroon. And as far back as I can remember, whenever people asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, my answer was always the same: “I want to be a priest.”

According to my mom, I started saying this since I was 5. Of course things changed along the way :). The ways of the Church did not align with who I wanted to become.

Back then I already had what I can only explain as a deep longing for the Divine. That attunement was there as far as I could remember.

No matter what was going on in our far from glamorous childhood, I always felt divinely protected.

That love for God always confused me because the teachings I received from the Church didn’t always match the God I could feel in my heart.

I couldn’t reconcile the God who was jealous, punitive, and fear-based with the Presence I felt, which was warm, protective, intimate, expansive, and utterly loving.

So I became just a bit of a rebel… you know, a BIG bit.

I had the annoying questions that no one wanted or could answer about religion. Or the answers I was given did not feel right for me at least.

Questions about whether a deep fear of God can coexist with true devotion. Questions about whether blind obedience is the same as love. Questions about why the teachings of Jesus, a man who embodied radical compassion, had been so distorted into dogma and threat. At the very least, that’s how I saw it.

I started exploring Christian mysticism, Eastern traditions, metaphysics, psychology, and eventually shadow work.

And slowly I de-dogmatized my relationship with God and with Jesus... The archetypal Jesus if you wish… The Christed human as I like to think of him.

And that archetype is within you too. Waiting to be awakened and claimed. Not in a religious way. As a journey of spiritual maturation.

This exploration did not push me away from the Divine, it was the other way around.

What I started realizing is that the journey of embodying your light, reclaiming your Soul’s purpose, embracing your authentic Self expression, which Cark Jung called individuation, is an archetypal journey, very similar to the journey of Christ, but for modern times. That journey is a mystical initiation.

It is the inner crucifixion of your former self. The one that used to find safety in Soul abandonment.

This is the reason why the title of my talk for this summit is Your light is your cross. And I don’t want it to sound like it is always a burden. Because it is not. But to your former Self, it feels like it until you surrender to the initiation. And eventually it liberates you.

This is what I explored with my Aaron Abke in our conversation for the summit.

And it is one of the most honest conversations I’ve ever had about the cost of carrying your calling and how to rise from it.

As I shared with Aaron:

“Your light has two faces: the radiance you love… and the archetypal wooden cross you must be willing to carry.”

And:

“The pushback you receive for shining isn’t personal. It’s physics.”

And:

“True humility is not disowning your brightness. It’s owning your humanness and your divinity in the same breath.”

If these words resonate, I want you to tune into the whole summit.

PS: I am a bit late in the promotion of this event, but it starts today. And the replays will be accessible for a few days. The beauty is that it is completely free.

And here’s the other beautiful thing:

You’re not just receiving my talk on the Christ archetype. You’re receiving the sessions of 20+ speakers heart-led speakers.

• If you’re on a path of embodying your light…

• If you’re wrestling with fear, persecution wounds, or the pain of being seen..

• If you’re ready to understand the crucifixion as an inner rite of passage…

This is for you.

→ You can sign up for free HERE.

In gratitude and reverence,
- Xavier