From shutdown to connected: the relational evolution these times demand
[Podcast] A conversation on loving better, masculine recalibration, and finding safety in intimacy
Intimacy is at the same time the thing we long for the most and that deeply terrifies us.
Don’t even get me started on the reasons.
Most of our wounding happens in relationships.
They are the places where we learn to lose ourselves.
And they are also the places where a great deal of healing and integration happens.
The issue is that with our modern obsession for sovereignty and independence, most people choose to check out, and I get it. Especially for men.
Many carry the wound of disconnection and equate intimacy with a loss of autonomy.
I have certainly felt that.
And my journey to becoming a dad of 3 and being in a committed relationship of nearly 11 years has taught me that there is a higher form of freedom that can be reclaimed through relational work.
That requires to build a newfound safety in intimacy.
That safety is only accessible if you are willing to reclaim radical intimacy with your Self. That includes pain, fears, power, light, joy and everything in between.
As a man, I am also noticing that this is a journey that men are uniquely invited to embrace during these times.
Would you agree?
A blueprint to thriving relationships
In this week’s episode of ENHEARTENED, I had the deep honor of sitting down with Bryan Reeves who is a voice I consider both grounded and fiercely compassionate, to explore what it means for men to truly love better.
Not by trying harder. But by reconnecting to what’s been shut down for too long.
Bryan is a relationship coach, author of Choose Her Every Day (Or Leave Her), and a man who has lived, lost, and learned his way into intimacy. What I appreciate most about him is that he doesn’t speak from theory, he speaks from scar tissue (that I consider to be the best kind of embodied wisdom), humility, and a commitment to growth.
Together we explored:
Why so many men emotionally check out in love
How the inner “warrior” can sabotage intimacy if left unbalanced
The real difference between a man’s pride and his spine
What it means to become “trustable” in relationships, not perfect, but present
The shifts that invite men back into connection without losing their strength
We also talk about the danger of performative healing, the pain of feeling unseen, and why repair work is the lost art every man must reclaim to love well.
This episode is not just for men. We all carry the same hindrances, but they just express themselves differently.
It’s for women who want to understand their partners. For sons, brothers, and fathers who are ready to evolve… And for anyone longing to break the cycle of disconnection, and find their way back to love..
Episode 11 of ENHEARTENED with Bryan Reeves is Live
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In gratitude and reverence,
— Xavier